Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Less than brilliant name choice

I passed by a childcare facility yesterday which I have passed many times before. This time, however, I took notice of the name of this business.

It's called "The Gingerbread House."

Sounds fun, whimsical, fairy tale-esque! A perfect place of wonder to leave your child! Just one problem: Wasn't the gingerbread house the home of the witch in Hansel & Gretel? You remember her, poor-sighted, spoke in rhymed couplets, ("Nibbling, nibbling like a mouse. Who's that nibbling on my house?") had a taste for dining on children?

Yup, bring your child here for the day! We'll stick 'em in a cage and force-feed 'em goodies until they're fattened up. Then we'll pop 'em in the oven at 450. One of these days, your child could be dinner for the rest of the children. Little Suzy, why don't you go ahead and get started on this shortbread shingle while I show your parents the rest of our facility?


HMSnow said...

Could there be any connection between this facility and the increase of childhood obesity in America? Hmmm... I'll have to get my team of specially-trained, super-paranoid conspiracy theorists on it right away. Maybe we could get an undercover agent to infiltrate the Gingerbread House, disguised as a preschool-aged child.

Allen said...

I'll get right on that, just as soon as I finish these baby-back ribs.

HMSnow said...

Ooooh. Sorry. I didn't know you'd gotten a part-time job at the Gingerbread House.