Sunday, March 09, 2008

Was Moses Tripping on Mt Sinai?

Under the category of stupid religious theories, professor Benny Shannon claims that Moses was tripping on Mt Sinai--and he doesn't mean Mo was clumsy. The voice of God was all a hallucination brought on by Moses drinking some derivative of the acacia tree that acted like ayahuasca.

This would explain God's statement on the Mount, "I am the Lord your God, who brought--Dude! Look at the size of my hand! It's hu-u-uge! It really is with a mighty hand and outstretched arm that I brought you little Jewish dudes out! So don't walk like an Egyptian, okay?"

Additionally, Shannon claims that Moses was toking when he saw the burning bush. "Time is perceived differently when you're under the influence of hallucinogens." So, the bush really did burn up in regular time, but Moses freeze framed the whole thing, because he was stoned out of his gourd on wacky juice. Although... it would explain that whole "I am that I am" thing. I mean, are those the words of a stoner, or what?

I kid. This guy doesn't.

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