"You shall have no other gods before me!"
"Okay, but how many can we have behind you?"
"Moses was poisoned at Mt Cyanide, so he took two tablets."
Jesus said "If you love me, feed my sheep."
What he did not specify was to whom we were to feed them."
(this was accompanied by a badly-drawn bulging-eyed sheep clutched by a scaly claw)
If the church benefits from persecution, shouldn't we elect the most anti-Christian politicians we can find?
And still they keep asking me to come back and teach!