I ordered a CD the other day from a company called CD Baby, who handle a lot of independent artists/bands. After confirmations of the order, I got this email.
*****
Allen,
Thank you for your order.
Your CD has been gently taken from our CD Baby shelves with sterilized contamination-free gloves and placed onto a satin pillow.
A team of 50 employees inspected your CD and polished it to make sure it was in the best possible condition before mailing.
Our packing specialist from Japan lit a candle and a hush fell over the crowd as he put your CD into the finest gold-lined box that money can buy.
We all had a wonderful celebration afterwards and the whole party marched down the street to the post office where the entire town of Portland waved "Bon Voyage!" to your package, on its way to you, in our private CD Baby jet on this day, Tuesday, March 13th.
I hope you had a wonderful time shopping at CD Baby. We sure did. Your picture is on our wall as "Customer of the Year." We're all exhausted but can't wait for you to come back to CDBABY.COM!!
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Sigh...
--Derek Sivers, president, CD Baby
*****
No, I didn't compose that myself, and no, I don't have any profitable, personal or emotional connections to the company. I don't care whether you order your next humor-blogs.com CD from them or not. Just thought the email was clever. Now stop harassing me! I've gotta go recover my firstborn from the CD Baby warehouse.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
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