Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The Lament of St Espressus of Java

For the Ironic Catholic, who asked for it.

A lament, when Bro Espressus discovered he had run out of coffee. Arrangement for the jaw harp.

You are worthy of praise, O Lord our God,
Creator of the coffee bean.

You are like a good cup of coffee:
Your depths of wisdom are impenetrable,
Your ways are inscrutable, too dark to see into.
From you comes invigoration and inspiration;
How joyfully you are met first thing in the morning!

But alas, O my God,
For I cannot praise you as you deserve!
For someone has finished off the coffee,
And has not replaced what they took!

Early I rose, to come before you with joyful singing,
And found the canister empty.
Empty like the Wilderness of Zin,
Like the barren places by the Dead Sea.
Empty, it was, bereft of its usefulness,
Much like Bro Adelmo, who, I suspect, is the jerk who did this to me.

My cup has run dry, O Sustainer of Life!
My pot has been emptied to the dregs!
The carafe--once holding your goodness--is hollow.
I could fetch some water,
But my efforts would still be groundless.

The cheerful singing of the brothers so very early
Is as the nattering of teeny chipmunks
In my caffeine-deprived state.
I curse their glee and wish them ill.
They drive me to lick the pot clean,
Hoping for a taste of renewing brew.

Come quickly, Lord, and answer me!
Come quickly, and refill the canister!
Oh Lord of the Bean, come rescue me,
Or I shall have to kill them all.


The Ironic Catholic said...

This is wonderful. I lift my espresso cup to you!

CMinor said...

I like how you worked in that Veggie Tales reference. And I can hear that jaw harp a-twangin' now!

The Ironic Catholic said...

P.s. I couldn't manage the jaw harp, but I did sing this in plainchant. It's over on my blog. ;)