Ever have those weeks where you just don’t get any blogging in? Are you tired of using the old “I’ve been really busy” excuse? Here at the ICFAB!*, we have devised some new—if slightly outrageous—excuses for you to use.
1. I was kidnapped and held for ransom, but the members of my family “don’t negotiate with terrorists.”
2. I made the mistake of signing an organ donor card without reading the fine print. They came to collect last week. 'Hope I don’t need my spleen!
3. I just spent a week in the hospital recovering from a fight I got into. My advice: Never tick off a Chihuahua with a switchblade!
4. I have been posting, but a computer worm programmed to devour only the funniest, most insightful posts has invaded blogger.com.
5. I’m practicing for Lent.
6. A bitter flame war over who was the best starship captain ended in a DoS! (I insisted it was Scott Bakula.)
7. I’ve fallen in love lately.
8. A recently-developed severe case of arachnophobia prevents me from using something called “the web.”
9. In a fit of nostalgia, I’ve switched back to using my old TRS-80.
10. I reached Nirvana for nearly 10 seconds yesterday, and I’m wiped out by the experience.
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*It Came From Allen's Brain!
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7 comments:
Is #7 true?
Clever stuff, BTW.
Well, IC, I wasn't gonna mention it, but since you brought it up here, I have fallen heels-over-head, deeply, madly--for you!
Kidding! I'm kidding, SIC!
I will tell you that #3 is true, though. (It isn't, but I'll tell you it is.)
Scott Bacula? You deserved it. He was reckless. Give me Gul Dukat any day.
What, I need to sic sic on you?
Sorry, couldn't resist.
IC said,
Sorry, couldn't resist.
Oh, if only I had a nickel for every woman who has said that to me! I'd have at least one, then.
Non-blogging excuse #11: beaten up by jealous husband for smart-aleck crack to his wife.
Ha!
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